Video: This year, I am keeping a business diary

I was sitting at my desk at 6 am one morning in December and wasn’t feeling great. Usually, I am quite happy in the morning, as I have ultimate peace to think, meditate, and plan my day. But this day, I felt differently. It wasn’t necessarily depression – more so exhaustion. Could it .....

I was sitting at my desk at 6 am one morning in December and wasn’t feeling great. Usually, I am quite happy in the morning, as I have ultimate peace to think, meditate, and plan my day. But this day, I felt differently.

It wasn’t necessarily depression – more so exhaustion. Could it be because it was December and I had just completed my final trip of the year, totaling about 60, or was it that the year had been exhausting and I would have to reset and do it all over again next year? In my first year as a business owner, I quickly learned the importance of eliminating the emotion of stress from my life.

At the end of the day, I can’t quit, can’t give up, or say mercy. I am the glue, and when you are the glue, giving up is really not an option – unless, of course, you are a fake leader. While the perception was that I was stressed, it couldn’t have been because I am not allowed to be.

Rather than concern myself, or start crying (kidding, I think), I decided to look back through my notes from last December at the same time. Sure enough, I had written (as I often do) a note about being stressed about growing the next year, not just in business, but as a person, a father, a friend. In retrospect, I feel pretty good about the growth of 2014, but I found it interesting that my mindset was pretty consistent year after year, yet, I didn’t keep that concern in an accessible place.

In 2015, I am going to try something different. I am going to keep a business journal of quick hit concepts, emotions and feelings. This way, in 2016, I can go back to those months and moments and scout out the consistency.

This way my off moments won’t scare me as much, more so provide me with an added comfort, as I will recognize the symptoms. If you haven’t noticed from my column, I am my own worst critic. I desire the best days, the best moments and the most successes.

It drives me. But, I certainly don’t want it to kill me. I would much rather create a bible of me that I can rely on to calm nerves and “stress”, find the moments where I feel most celebrated, and reflect on those.

Whenever I speak with my staff or recognize a great moment, I try to encourage them to hold onto that feeling and go there when moments turn stressful – as they certainly will in PR. I must follow my own advice. We will see how the documentation goes.

But, at the very least, it should help me understand why I feel up and down throughout the year. It should provide me with a map to my emotions.